Month: January 2020

Fully Alive

Posted on by FZadmin

Fully Alive

Awakening

I watched a flash-mob marriage proposal on facebook yesterday, and my heart pounded and my eyes teared up.  A few months ago, I watched a video ad for some exciting vacation destination with a Bungalow over the turquoise water surrounded by coral and fish, and my heart cried out for that kind of beauty and rest and adventure.  A couple years ago I watched the making of the “This is Me” song from The Greatest Showman and I wanted to stand up and dance and sing along, actually, I think I did.  These things moved me, they stirred something inside of me.  Each of them echoed off a different part of me that has been tamped down, quieted, suppressed.  Too many days, the flash-mobs are lacking and the cries of the struggles of the people that I love are loud.  Too many days, the dreams of bungalows and coral reefs and turquoise waters drift away and the tide of financial concerns, duties and responsibilities roll in.  Far too many days, “This is me” sounds more like a quiet apology that a proud declaration.  Anybody else? 

A Different View

I can, and I have in the past, looked at those things and myself and quieted them with the words of selfish, or unreasonable, or too much; but what if those things that cause our hearts to quicken aren’t the result of selfishness or unreal expectation.  What if they are just a glimpse into the world and life we were made for, the Eden that our soul was made to live in.  If I take a moment to think of the world God created for us, before the fall, a life of acceptance of each other, a partnership with and enjoyment of nature, an easy conversational intimacy with God, the joy of work without toil and life of adventure without pain , then… is it any wonder that the glimpses of beauty and peace, joy and laughter, strength and hope call out to my heart?  Jesus came to offer us life and life to the full.  What does that mean?  I think these little things offer us glimpses.  They stir our hearts to re-awaken what living is supposed to feel like, but not so that we run off and chase the things, but so that we recognize the places we need more life and places we are called to offer life.

 

Fully Alive

What if you moved and breathed and loved and lived from the heart of someone who, not only, was fully alive, but aware of the power of being fully alive.  Who knew that your very presence could breathe life into those around you, that your energy entering a room, could spark energy in those present, that your joy brought joy, and your hope brought hope, and that when your love filled a room, no heart could remain untouched.  Oh my beautiful friend, you do, you have all of it inside of you, Jesus has given you His hope, His joy, His love, His life – keep chasing Him and embrace it.

 

 

 

“Look out ’cause here I come 
And I’m marching on to the beat I drum
I’m not scared to be seen
I make no apologies, this is me.” – The Greatest Showman, This Is Me

The Loudest Voice

Posted on by FZadmin

“When you start to feel like things should have been better this year, remember the mountains and valleys that got you here. They are not accidents, and those moments weren’t in vain. You are not the same. You have grown and you are growing. You are breathing, you are living, you are wrapped in endless, boundless grace. And things will get better. There is more to you than yesterday.” 

— Morgan Harper Nichols

A New Year

Three Weeks…  21 days… Where has it gone?   Just a short time ago, we relished in the last days of December, hopefully working a little less, spending time with family, enjoying the peacefulness of the last days of the year.  Reflecting on the year past and the one about to begin.  And on some level we made commitments, maybe in the form of traditional New Years Resolutions, maybe just quietly in our thoughts… some things need to change, some things can be better.

I made those commitments.  And yet, here we are, three weeks into a new year, and at least for me, the old routine was louder than the new changes.  The numbers on the scale haven’t changed much, I have yet to make it to the gym, my weekly activity report on my phone condemns me, January is already over budget, and I’m not sure my family would attest to any substantial change in my patience or intentionality.

Conflicting Voices

And in the silence, as the voice of accusation comes, I find myself quick to agree.  I’m a failure.  I can’t change.  I will never be the friend/mom/wife I’m supposed to be.  I will always be overweight, out of shape, broke, and distracted.  I can spiral in the failure, I can allow the accusations to be the loudest voice I hear, but then I take a moment to sit still, to engage in a conversation with my God and he reminds me…

He reminds me that He thinks I am fantastic.  He reminds me that He delights in me.  That every failure is not wasted, as long as I fail forward.  That He looks at me and sees all the things He created me to be and do and that He cheers loudly when I succeed, and cheers me on even louder when I fail, because He knows I will learn and do it differently next time.  And I underestimate that all the time.  I forget how absolutely incredibly much Jesus loves me.  I forget that He sees in me sunshine and delight, joy and hope, love and grace, beauty and strength, playfulness and intelligence, and so much more.

 

Making a Choice

So today, I chose to send the voice of accusation back where it belongs.  That is not my voice, that is not my Fathers’ voice, that is the voice of the one who fears me and what I could become if I stopped listening to him.  Today I choose to allow God’s voice to be the loudest voice, to allow His Truth to be the only truth that matters, to refuse to be defined by my failure, but rather to get back up and do it again.  So, I’m adjusting those resolutions and commitments.  I still want to accomplish them, they are good things, but I’m adding a new one, a better one, to the very top of the list;  This year I choose to live in the space where God’s voice is the loudest voice and His truth is the loudest truth.  I know I need more of that.  I know I need more of Him.  And I pray this for you too, may you be reminded daily of His delight in you and may His voice be the loudest voice in your life too.